Thursday, September 4, 2008

The Boy with the Lucky Sperm


maria said...

dunno, david. i think he's unlucky. who in the world wants to be married at 18 to a 17 year and be forced to be a father? sucks to be him.

he's already been quoted as saying this isn't what he wanted, and apparently palin tried to force a wedding before the news broke.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ But he's standing on the stage of history! (Young Levi should've removed the chewing gum, though.)

Vince Spence said...


Before you do a survey of your readers/posters, I'll give you the results.

Should he marry the young lady?

Yes: 20,000,001 black females
NO: 20,000,002 black males

Number of people surprised at the result: ZERO

However, since 70% of black females are already unmarried, 14,000,000 asked for more information on the young man.

This election is softening your brain into mush. You are lowering yourself to the level of that bunch of white bigots. Take a day or two off. Put the earphones on and listen to the fabulous music selection you have.

maria said...

i'm sorry; when did whites lose the right to vote, vince? you are such a racist. how can you make this about race?

here's my vote and i'm a white female. should he marry?

NO. they are too young and this isn't the 5`0s where you HAVE t get married if you're pregnant.

god, you're an ass.

neptune said...

Wow, vince spence, you've got some stones calling someone a bigot. You just managed to insult (or try to) every Black woman in this country. Are you lost? This wouldn't appear to be to your neighborhood unless you're looking for someplace to plant a burning cross.

As far as the lucky sperm is concerned, I suspect that if the election doesn't go the "right" way, the inopportune engagement will be quietly called off.

bklyn6 said...

Look at that! Bristol isn't covering her baby bump with her baby brother and that security blanket.

flygon...the one with the aerotactics skillz said...

it was a joke! geeez! this is all tooooo absurd to be matched up with statistics, or choice, or will. i think its a great graphic for political whore mongers! ooooooh the lush of irony! i know her big brother is seething.

flygon...the one with the aerotactics skillz said...

one more thing. i think it funny to hear about lily whiteness fucking and hav'n babies. this is the only funny stuff i can enjoy about i moose killah!

Anonymous said...

This is all so reality TV.
Seriously, how did this crap seep out into "real" reality?

dez said...

I love that the party of "family values" is willing to throw its own children under the bus in the name of political expediency. God bless the U.S.A.!!

bklyn6 said...

This is all so reality TV.
Seriously, how did this crap seep out into "real" reality?

All that's needed is Maury Povich.

dez said...

^I think Jerry Springer would want a piece of that action.

I went over to Andrew Sullivan's blog and found this:

Read from the bottom up.

blackink said...

As much as I hate feeding the trolls, Neptune, that was a great line.

And I go back and forth on this one: I would have hated to be a married father at 18 but what other prospects did he really have? Apparently, he's not even in school anymore.

Already, he's gotten a haircut and cleaned up that peach fuzz. This may turn out to be a win for him - he'll never really have to be involved with the kid. We all know this is a shamockery.

Invisible Hand said...

Again, perhaps I lack the perspective to really know for certain, but it seems as though a lot of people are "stepping into history", seemingly out of no where. Is this the new America? Is this what happens when the American Dream ceases to hold the collective imagination.

Cause I gotta say, right now we're living in a game show culture. This guy, as far as history is concerned, won the lottery (for better and for worse). Maybe it's just an extension of the fifteen minutes of fame axiom and the result of the media echo chamber, but I think it's fascinating how many people in recent memory have gone from unknown to household name in a matter of milliseconds for relatively benign reasons (we're not talking Lee Harvey Oswalds or John Wilkes Booths here).

I don't know, something that struck me.

Lola Gets said...

Call me strange, but I think that folks who concieve together should give a true shot at marriage together. I think kids do better with with two parent households.

Yeah, yeah, Im Black, too.


Undercover Black Man said...

^ I got no problem with them getting married. I do have a problem with Levi Johnston having a place on the stage of American history... just 'cause he knocked up his teenage girlfriend. That does not make him part of the Palin family.

Vince Spence said...

neptune said...
...Are you lost? This wouldn't appear to be to your neighborhood unless you're looking for someplace to plant a burning cross.

Mr. Neptune,
I'll stay out of what appears to be YOUR neighborhood, if you will stay out of MY neighborhood.

UBM has scores of black bigots for every white bigot that visits HIS site. I came here for David's music but I stay because I enjoy hearing you guys demonize the entire white race for every single thing that doesn't, hasn't or won't go your way.

destruction said...

Invisible Hand is on point. Say hello to J-FED 2008. That boy is gonna be turning down 100's of pieces of pussy everyday from the creepers trying to get a lil piece of the sperm heard round the world. When this begins to fade, all he has to do is release his album (The Real Ice Ice Baby) money mo money mo honey.

neptune said...

oh, vince spence, sweetie, life must be so scary for you right about now. You have my sincerest sympathy.

What would you do if you didn't have the interwebs as a place to go to stir up shite with the people you call "you guys". Fortunately for you, UBM is a gracious host who probably recognizes the service you're providing by your example.

And a presumptuous little one, aren't you? You should be aware that not everyone here is Black or male or lives in a "ghetto".

DeAngelo Starnes said...

there goes vince spence and his Pabst Blue Ribbon again.

cnulan said...


so it's just the yard beer talking?


NunaOni said...

>>I do have a problem with Levi Johnston having a place on the stage of American history... just 'cause he knocked up his teenage girlfriend.<<

Yea what he said. Imagine if these were Democrats. I am not a fan of either party, but I am a hater of bullshitters.

If they couldn't watch over their daughter in tiny Alaska, how are they gonna keep an eye on two teenagers? If this boy goes away to college they are in trouble.

Vince Spence said...

deangelo starnes said...
there goes vince spence and his Pabst Blue Ribbon again.

Hi again, Mr. Starnes. Long time.
No idea what the PBR slur is about. I haven't had a drink or a drug since 11/1995. (but, who is counting?)

Quick question. You tell us you live in the Westminster/Broomfield area near Denver. Wiki tells me theses areas are less than 1% black. Even MY neighborhood has more blacks. Whassup wid that?

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Dag, Vince. Why don't you try adding something of value when you visit? Instead of trying to precipitate useless flaming?

I don't recall you ever saying anything cogent, thoughtful or genuinely provocative on the subject of race since you've been here.

Being that you think about race all the time, I find that odd.

How about I get you started? Were you in Baltimore for the MLK riots of '68? I know a white guy who got caught in traffic, and some blacks tried to set him on fire in his car.

How about sharing some real-life experiences like that, so as to contribute to our collective knowledge base?

DeAngelo Starnes said...

Dave re: vince spence,

see what I was saying about an e-stalker now?

tejanojim said...

yeah, i'd guess that the guy is pretty terrified right now. some 18 year old doofus now has to face 1. marriage 2. fatherhood 3. a shit scary mother in law 4. the possibility of being a punch line for jay leno for um, the next decade. i got precious little sympathy for any of these chuckleheads, but this guy just had a whole big bag of mess dropped on his life.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Maybe he should do an abstinence PSA.

tejanojim said...

Heh. Why do a PSA? He could make ads for Trojan condoms. "Don't let this happen to you, kids."

peosmom said...

Can you imagine if this was Obama and Malia was 17, knocked up and unmarried? The baby daddy would NOT be getting paraded around like some kind of hero and Obama wouldn't be able to be elected dogcatcher!

I feel really sorry for these kids tbh. When all you've heard your whole life is that sex is dirty and wrong and condoms don't work the outcome is really not all that surprising. Also, it's very sad that Bristol didn't feel that she could talk to either of her parents BEFORE she slept w/her bf. She already knew what they were going to say so she didn't see the point.