Friday, August 21, 2009

(Annotated) Celebrity Tweets of the Day!

(Below are more actual, honest-to-goodness Twitter posts... all from earlier today. Plus my personal parenthetical commentary.)

Sandra Bernhard: “hope you are all checking out my first single with chrissie hynde on itunes the album drops tuesday august 25th whatever it takes.”
(The song sucks.)

Jeremy Piven: “contest for the best reason u haven’t seen ‘the Goods’ 500K following...”
(Reason? Because it probably sucks.)

Paris Hilton: “On my way to go visit some of the most poverty stricken villages in Central America. Going to be a very emotional day, God bless them all.”
(Dang, Princess. You could’ve just come to Langley Park.)

Kevin Smith: “Glourious! Quentin’s BASTERDS is at 86% Fresh at RottenTomatoes. Going tomorrow morning. Been waiting for years to see this. I bow to Q.”
(I just got back from seeing “Inglourious Basterds.” I’m still waiting for Tarantino to tell another story about humans.)

Yoko Ono: “Give Peace A Chance. It’s time for us to come together, and say it again, and to realize, again, that War Is Over, if you want it.”
(Ummm... okay.)

Oprah Winfrey: “thank you and black eyed peas. I love you. see you for our party in the streets of chicago.”
(Hey Oprah... Yoko Ono says you suck.)

Ellen DeGeneres: “Celebrity sighting of the day: Portia de Rossi, eating lunch in my kitchen!”
(I’d better leave that one alone.)


lawegohard said...

OMG, I totaly thought Yoko Ono was dead.

Funny post.

bklyn6 said...

How many Lennon/McCartney songs did Yoko reference in that quote?

Thanks for the commentaries. :-)

newtoast said...

"I’m still waiting for Tarantino to tell another story about humans."

I don't think he's made a better movie than Jackie Brown, and I'm starting to suspect he never will. Dude desperately needs an editor but at this point has enough juice that he'll never get one.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ "Jackie Brown" is exactly what I was thinking about. Dude just needs to give a damn about something other than past movies he's seen.

Obie Joe Media said...

The sharpness of your commentaries reminds me of the analogy of Twitter/FB/and so forth to high school. The more followers, the more empty the head. Whatever happened to actual exclusivity as a custom in celeb-land?

daughterofthedream said...

LOL, never thought I'd see John "douchebag" Mayer on your site!

dez said...

I wonder who of them writes their own tweets. The Ellen one was cute, I thought :-)

bklyn6 said...

^Ghost tweeters. I never thought of that. :-)