UBM goes to Metairie

This morning, for the first time since coming to Louisiana, I drove through Metairie (the nearest suburb to New Orleans). Needed to pick up my new jacket after alterations, and had time to kill.

Hey, remember that Smith & Wesson cologne I mentioned? The haberdasher hit me off with a few free samples. I’ll try it out tonight at the charity event I’m going to.

I’ll be like, “Ask me about my scent.” (And people’ll be like, “Yeah, dude... we been meaning to talk to you about your ‘scent.’ ”)

Anyhoo... New Orleans may look like no other city in America, but Metairie looks like every other suburb. Veterans Boulevard gots nothing going on except for convenient shopping. And I decided to make a few quick stops.

Passed by a pet store. On a window were painted the words “African and South American Cichlids.” I was like, “Ohhh shit! They got cichlids?”

Then I was like, “What the fuck is a cichlid?” (Turns out it’s a family of fish.)

I ducked into a CVS drug store. Made an impulse purchase of CVS-brand cookies. The dark-chocolate-topped butter cookies.

Know what I like to do with those bad boys? Y’all should try this. Get you some chocolate-topped butter cookies... and spread peanut butter on ’em.

Mmmm... yums. I’m doing it right now, bitches!!