Saturday, March 27, 2010

UBM goes to Metairie

This morning, for the first time since coming to Louisiana, I drove through Metairie (the nearest suburb to New Orleans). Needed to pick up my new jacket after alterations, and had time to kill.

Hey, remember that Smith & Wesson cologne I mentioned? The haberdasher hit me off with a few free samples. I’ll try it out tonight at the charity event I’m going to.

I’ll be like, “Ask me about my scent.” (And people’ll be like, “Yeah, dude... we been meaning to talk to you about your ‘scent.’ ”)

Anyhoo... New Orleans may look like no other city in America, but Metairie looks like every other suburb. Veterans Boulevard gots nothing going on except for convenient shopping. And I decided to make a few quick stops.

Passed by a pet store. On a window were painted the words “African and South American Cichlids.” I was like, “Ohhh shit! They got cichlids?”

Then I was like, “What the fuck is a cichlid?” (Turns out it’s a family of fish.)

I ducked into a CVS drug store. Made an impulse purchase of CVS-brand cookies. The dark-chocolate-topped butter cookies.

Know what I like to do with those bad boys? Y’all should try this. Get you some chocolate-topped butter cookies... and spread peanut butter on ’em.

Mmmm... yums. I’m doing it right now, bitches!!

10 comments:

odocoileus said...

You realize this is why you gots to go the big man's sto'?

VenetianBlond said...

Ha! You outed the secret! Not only do I put peanut butter on cookies, but I do it to chocolate covered "granola" bars too. It's like dessert Tabasco, put it on anything.

radrean said...

Mmmm... Makes me wanna buy some Dove dark chocolate ice cream and crunchy peanut butter right now.

uglyblackjohn said...

Dood - drive further out and see the real South.
Keep driving until you see mostly stores with hand-painted signs and enjoy the good eats.

Undercover Black Man said...

odocoileus... coming all harsh with the truth and shit...

Undercover Black Man said...

VenetianBlond: Next stop... mayonnaise on vanilla wafers.

Invisible Woman said...

^ *sigh*...oh, ubm...

lol

VenetianBlond said...

Sure! I put mayo in my layered banana pudding, with nilla wafers, banana slices, and pudding. Just a little, for tang. Not Miracle Whip. That would be gross.

odocoileus said...

odocoileus... coming all harsh with the truth and shit...

Well, cookies is partly why I gots to go to the big man's sto'.

Goddamn Canadians. Who told them to put maple syrup in cookies.

Davis Rogan said...

Tell you what though, the Acme Oyster house on Vets by Causeway is the bomb. To quote Ballzack, "I don't go to Metarie unless I really have to ..."