Tuesday, May 15, 2007

‘Cavemen’: Will it suck? Or blow?

Yes, ABC has picked up “Cavemen” for its fall schedule.

Worse, the network is calling it “a hilarious and thought-provoking social commentary on race relations in today’s America.”

(All right, fuck the dumb shit... it’s Revolution Time, people! Y’all bring the guns, I’ll bring the paper plates.)

For a sample of the cutting-edge racial satire to come, click here and watch a brief vidclip that ABC just uploaded to its website… like they’re proud of it!

One caveman chides his fellow caveman for using the word “Cro-Magger.” To which the second caveman replies: “It’s okay if we use it.”

Which leads to a riff on “Baby Got Back” that must be seen to be believed. Except, if you see it, you’ll feel compelled to rinse your eyeballs with Clorox and set your ears on fire.

“Cavemen”… one more consumptive cough in the slow death of network television.

19 comments:

Dougfp said...

Truly dreadful. And why does the makeup look even cheaper than it does in the Geico ads? They certainly didn't waste the budget on the writing staff.

Andrew said...

It's probably no coincidence that ABC is the only network that I don't watch a single show on. They picked up this Caveman show, yet it appears that they've passed on that political comedy from Mitch Hurwitz.

SJ said...

No no no no no no NO!!!

Well at least 30 Rock and The Office are still going to be on next season.

dez said...

They cancelled George Lopez, but made room for this??

dez said...

Oh, and I think the show will suuuuuuuuuck!

Undercover Black Man said...

Lopez was talking smack in the L.A. Times today about it... got bleeped... I think he said "fucking 'Cavemen'?"

George also flung the race card. Like, Chicanos can't be in a show but cavemen can?

Which I thought made Lopez look pretty bad. ABC keeping the show on this long has made him very rich. But I guess all the money in the world can't seem to fill up that hole inside.

dez said...

I found Lopez's show amusing enough (especially after "Greetings From Tucson" was cancelled and eliminated George's biggest competition for Mexican-American viewers), and it did get jerked around by the network with all the timeslot changes. Still, I can't help but think of Lopez's last special: "Why You Cryin'?" :-)

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Hee hee...

Roberto Rivera said...

Not only is it dreadful, it's anthropologically wrong: "cavemen" were Neanderthals, not "Cro-Magnons." The latter were the modern humans who displaced the "cavemen." I know: it's a picayune point compared to the show's many and obvious faults. But, it's example of how this show screams "opportunistic piece of crap with no intelligence in its area code."

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Thanks for the link, too, Roberto. Are you involved in prisoner ministry?

Dan Coyle said...

What I think is absolutely insane about this is they didn't use the original actors. They're half the appeal of the ads! Of course, that it exists at all is even more absolutely insane.

Undercover Black Man said...

Yep, Dan. What makes those commercials work is the performances... that's always been the case. How could they not have hired those actors?

justjudith said...

this is ludicrous. period. reminds me of something the old upn would try. i'm not gonna watch out of protest. anything can work for thirty seconds. i guess the pine sol lady will get a show soon...wait a minute...a sista won't get a show. although because of her i strongly believe in the power of pine sol. now that's clean!

Undercover Black Man said...

I wanna see the Roaming Gnome going from city to city solving murders.

dez said...

The Roaming Gnome is already tied up appearing on "The Amazing Race," the little pimp.

ItAintEazy said...

I never thought anything would make me want to watch that pre-emptively cancelled reality show "Welcome to the Neighborhood", but here we go.

Dan Coyle said...

I wanna see the Roaming Gnome going from city to city solving murders.

...with KUNG FU.

trixnee said...

Am I the only one insulted by the way the cavemen are subtly compared to black people grrrrr. What are they saying, black people are unevolved white people?! bastardos

Undercover Black Man said...

You ain't the only one, Trixnee. I'm trying not to take it personally... but heck, I'm still mad about "Planet of the Apes."

Thanks for stopping by. And welcome to the world of blogging. It'll be habit-forming once you get rolling with it. And a great way to develop your voice as a writer.