Weird. Last year felt like a strong year for movies. But this morning’s Academy Award noms seem like a weak pot of coffee.
I wouldn’t begrudge Martin Scorsese his overdue Oscar, but be real; “The Departed” was an overblown B-movie and a waste of a lot of people’s great talent.
Terrific to see Ryan Gosling nominated for “Half Nelson”; this kid is shaping up to be the next Edward Norton.
Also good to see Forest Whitaker nominated for “The Last King of Scotland”; hope he doesn’t show up wearing that blackface makeup from the movie!
Will Smith? “The Pursuit of Happyness”? No way in hell that was an Oscar-worthy performance. Clive Owen is much more deserving for “Children of Men.”
But hey, with two black head coaches going to the Super Bowl, and two black men up for Best Actor, this could turn out to be the best year for black people since 1984.
Ahhh, 1984… Bill Cosby resurrected the sitcom by playing a doctor married to a lawyer (when NBC wanted him to be blue-collar)… Eddie Murphy showed Hollywood that a black star could single-handedly carry a blockbuster action picture, without having to be a white star’s “buddy”… (Can you imagine if Sylvester Stallone had made “Beverly Hills Cop,” as originally planned?)… Jesse Jackson ran for president, and pulled 3.5 million votes in the Democratic primaries… And who was the toast of Broadway? A sister calling herself “Whoopi Goldberg”… Wynton Marsalis emerged as the “Young Lion” of jazz, while the priapic Prince popped his load on movie screens from sea to shining sea, rewriting pop-culture history with “Purple Rain”…
Yeah, ’84 was the bomb…
Wait, what was I talking about?… Oh, right. Fuck a Will Smith!
As for Best Actress, well, dangit… I haven’t seen any of them flicks. But the first one I intend to is “Notes on a Scandal.” The trailer's great.
Best Supporting Actor… hey, what the… two more Negroes? Has the world gone topsy-turvy? I think Eddie Murphy is being overpraised for his performance in “Dreamgirls.” (His last number had me thinking of “James Brown’s Celebrity Hot Tub Party.”) Djimon Hounsou in “Blood Diamond” I didn’t see.
And sorry, Marky Mark… if anybody deserves an acting nomination for “The Departed,” it’s Alec Baldwin.
For Supporting Actress, I’ll be rooting for Jennifer Hudson, because she did rock that showstopper, didn’t she? But Abigail Breslin might cop for “Little Miss Sunshine.” Hollywood lurvs that movie; I kinda like it too.
For Adapted Screenplay, here’s a chance for “Children of Men” to win something (along with Cinematography), though Alfonso Cuaron was straight-up robbed in the Director category.
Original Screenplay? I need to see some more movies, but “Little Miss Sunshine” sounds like a safe bet.
Animated Feature Film? “Happy Feet” all the way, babe… those cute little penguins… they were singin’! Except for that one… remember, the tap-dancing one? Wasn't that a trip when he started tap-dancing?… Boy, I was laughin’ and grinnin'… penguins…
What was I saying?… Oh, right. Mother-FUCK a Marky Mark!!