Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Leave my face out of the conversation.

So I’m sitting in the men’s room at work, and I happen to read the wrapper on the Precious brand toilet paper. It says “facial quality.”

I’m thinking, “You know... I would be perfectly satisfied with ‘butthole quality.’ ”

14 comments:

Geneva Girl said...

TMI.

Max Reddick said...

Ah, so true. Making it of such quality that it can be used on your face is simply superfluous. I am satisfied if it is only of the quality sufficient for the purposes for which it is needed.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Eloquently stated.

'Drea said...

Hee hee. The folks at Precious want you to know that they've exceeded expectations...

maria said...

too funny.

have you ever experienced toilet paper outside the US?

it's like dog butthole quality.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Funny you should mention, but isn't that, like, a serious "global warming" issue? That the key to the softness and durability of U.S. toilet paper is the use of tree pulp? That the fiber's just not the same from recycled?

Good luck telling the American people we'd better adjust to rougher toilet paper if we want to be good global citizens.

maria said...

i have been using recycled toilet paper for years and no longer know if it's less soft than other kinds.

you get used to it, i guess, or it is still soft. who knows!

when i was in bogota 25 years ago the toilet paper was like crepe paper.

lawegohard said...

Exactly UBM. A lot of folks outside of the West are cleaning with their left hand and using water.

Kellybelle said...

LOL. Too soft toilet paper clogs the drains. I uase scott tissue--gets the job done and dissolves.

Undercover Black Man said...

Don't worry, y'all... I'm about the change the subject...

odocoileus said...

One swipe a clean wipe...

We bring you the doodoo chasers!


Betacha can't guess where that's from.

Undercover Black Man said...

^ Dude, who you think you talkin' to?

I'm a card-carrying member of the Promentalshitbackwashpsychosis Enema Squad.

(Which one is George Clinton?)

odocoileus said...

Alright, you're the one dude who would know right away.

Music to get your sh*t together by.

The tidy bowl of your brain.

Groovelax.

that dude said...

Hell no, I DEMAND facial quality.